Posted by Maria Jesus Marin Lopez on Saturday, November 23, 2019
Life is a cocktail of moments. There’re sad,happy, exciting moments. Tragic, fearful, fearless moments. Boring moments. Limbo moments. WTF moments! Non of these moments are permanent, the only permanent thing is whatever we have learned about ourselves and others. whatever moment you are experiencing right now just remember that it won’t last forever. Our existence swings from states of expansion and contraction, knowing this natural rhythm of our existence allows us to connect more deeply to being calmly in the NOW.
We have the need to be alone so we can tap into the depths of our soul. There's a difference between being alone and being lonely. The first it's a place of power, connection and creativity. The second is a place of desempowerment, disconection and isolation.
When we are trully anchored in our aloness we need to be witnessed. We need to be seen. The truth is that we are not islands and sometimes we might loose sight of the reason behind our need to be alone.
If you feel separete from everyone and everything maybe you are not in the true power of being alone.
Our path is unique to us and it's meant to be walked alone. Along our path we encounter other souls that are walking their own path and the moment we see eachother we become a witness to their journey.
We are alone but deeply connected to everything and everyone.
If you want to spoil your children work on yourself. Resolve unconscious fears and traumas so you can be emotionally available to them. Spoil them by ofering a drama free household. Spoil them by learning to see them as they are not as a projection of who you don't allow yourself to be. Spoil them by being authentic, humble, loving. Spoil them by saying SORRY when you have a bad day and you loose your temper. Spoil them by creating more harmony in your relatinships. Spoil them by courageously loving yourself.
To create harmony with our young children we must put ourselves in their place and understand that they do not see the world in the same way we see it. Concepts that are simple and logical for us probably still do not mean anything to them.
Remember that our children learn by copying our behavior, and that our behavior outweighs our words.
For example, if we want our children to learn to share, instead of telling them to share their toy with their friend we should take the time to teach them what it means to share. We will create situations at home where we will show them with practical examples what it is to share, for example: "Mom says, Dad, do you want to share your sandwich with me?" Dad responds "Yes, mom, I'd love to share my sandwich with you, here's a bit" "Thanks, Dad for sharing"
As a game we are involving children in the knowledge of what it means to share. When it is their trun we positively reinforce their action, "Thanks for sharing"
We must also take into account that sometimes the child will not want to share and we must respect his decision without judging.
I do this with my three little ones and the truth is that there is a lot of harmony between them.
Remember that you are the model they will follow, it is a great responsibility and a great satisfaction.
In order to create harmony in our relationships, it is imperative that we create a safe emotional space.
The first step is to COMMIT ourselves to put all our emotional energy in the relationship, in this way we are present and available to us and our partner. This anchors CONFIDENCE, the most important ingredient when it comes to feeling emotionally secure. We give ourselves permission to be HONEST with what we feel, think and with who we are. We understand that NEGOTIATION helps us to overcome any type of conflict. WE RESPECT that the other person has another experience, opinion, perspective of reality. We LOVE with COMPASSION the emotional wounds of our partner and mutually we accompany each other to heal creating healthy BOUNDARIES.
When we create this emotional space, we enjoy FREEDOM and the right environment for personal and relationship growth.